Give Voice to Your Agency!

It is truly the most wonderful time of the year, and I am not talking about Christmas.

Happy Pride, and welcome to the month where the rainbow flag is front and center! The rainbow flag reflects the courageous unicorns and rich diversity in the LGBTQIAP community—lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer (or questioning), intersex, asexual (or allies), and pansexual.  We celebrate ourselves daily, but during this time especially, highlighting the dynamic characteristics and traits we share with our cisgender/straight allies:

✨ Be true to who you are.

✨ Disrupt societal constraints at all costs.

✨ Thrive in your unique sparkle of greatness.

I have spent 14 years in New York City, not only falling in love with this cosmopolitan, concrete jungle, but also falling in love with the proud, black, queer man I am today! Growing up in North Carolina, in a religious African-American household, there was not a lot of representation in my family or in the media (at the time) of people who were “different.” The immense pressure to survive in a biased heteronormative world that alienates anyone who is different, especially the LGBTQIAP community, is a huge detriment to mankind globally.

Queer people do not grow up true to ourselves, but rather playing a version of ourselves that sacrifices authenticity to minimize humiliation, judgment, and prejudice. Moving to New York after college allowed me the space to give voice to my agency. This enlightening journey that I have taken to confront my need for self-discovery has been a gift in disguise that I cherish deeply. My intentionality in having a gay, culturally responsive therapist gave me the strength to report my homophobic former supervisor and empowered me to set healthy boundaries, even when it went against another person of color. Working on the board for Impulse Group New York, a gay nonprofit organization, allowed me the opportunity to support gay men during the pandemic by creating COVID Sutra Kits: essentials for a gay man for getting through and getting off during a global pandemic. We also created virtual events for the community that ranged from a game night with snack boxes to an open forum discussing the unjust police killings of black and brown people. 

I have become a disruptive change agent dedicated to helping other queer people create a life wiser and truer to themselves. Some cisgender/heterosexual people will never know that feeling if they, too, do not do the work. 

Key Takeaways:

✨ Give voice to your agency.

✨ Celebrate people's differences!

✨ Stop weaponizing the heteronormative agenda as if it is the end all, be all, because it is not!

Cheers to being more of you! Razzle dazzle and remember, always shimmer up!

Song of the Month:

 A Deeper Love – (Artist: Aretha Franklin)